In The Beginning

Hello People

As this is my first blog I assume 'People' does not actually address too many people, maybe just my mother and a few close friends. Hi Mum!! Now in case you came here thinking this was some sort of American frat house or a university ball game I do apologise but unfortunately it is neither of those things. This is documentation of my foray with cancer, more specifically testicular cancer, hence the name Uniballer.

I realise that there is a reasonable possibility that you know nothing about me, I would take the time and describe myself to you, but the plan is to get people to read this and describing myself would only scare potential viewers away. Instead for now I give you a sentence 'I am a private person'. Now this begs the question as to why? Why is a private person writing a potentially non-private blog? To answer simply, I've tried being a private person and it haven't worked out too well, but more on that later.

I've been wanting to start a blog for awhile now but I have always believed I had nothing good to say or at least nothing that people would want to hear. One reason I thought my experience would be unwanted is because it was not the average cancer story. I didn't get misdiagnosed and sent away with tablets for a headache, my treatment only consisted of one cycle and the whole ordeal from diagnosis to end, took three months. Out of all the stories I've heard this, to me, felt out of place, most people spent months battling cancer and my small skirmish was not really worthy to discuss. I thought this was the case until very recently when I mentioned my cancer to a few fellow patients and was bombarded with question after question and practically interrogated to spill the beans on the one lone soldier situation. Therefore this hopefully will clear up a few questions and maybe give you more of an insight into the life of a patient with a 'good' cancer experience.

The title of this specific blog, if I figure out how to correctly name it is 'In the Beginning' this is not meant to be a religious reference but really just a start point, as over my 19 years I've found the beginning is generally the best place to start a story. Now the real question is, Where to begin?

Seventeen, rain, mud, rugby. Like most weekends of my school life I had devoted my time to the art of chasing an odd shaped ball backwards and forwards while nimbly avoiding the opposing participants. This game was not in anyway different to any other but just by chance on this fateful August morning I took a knock to my crown jewels or testicles if I were being more blunt and this was to be forever chronicled as the start of my cancer journey.

I was seventeen at the time of this incident, and during that time my jewels had never given me pain (unless someone kicked them, and then of course they did). This record of painless testicles however ended that day as when I was in the shower scrubbing off the extra coating of mud, they wouldn't stop aching. The day after, when I was walking to and from school, they wouldn't stop burning. If this torment was in my arm or my leg I would have told someone, rushed to the doctor or at least mentioned it to my parents to see if it was normal, but these were my testicles we're talking about and surprisingly I wasn't too willing to talk about my manhood.

At the time due to my reluctance to voice my problems I turned to the 'Mighty Google' as my prior knowledge of testicles only consisted of their appearance from on high. Perhaps some males reading this might have perused Google themselves and learnt the same information I wish I hadn't. It turns out that the two things hanging in between a blokes legs are surprisingly fragile, there is a myriad of ailments that can affect your private parts ranging from the rather basic such as a bruise or light bleeding to the out right gruesome such as the potential to rupture or even deglove your crown jewels. Just as a warning if you have just eaten or prone to sickness I advise steering clear of Google.

After learning a bit too much information about testicles I came to the conclusion it was bruise. During my trawling of the internet a bruise and cancer were the only two slightly plausible options. Of course I assumed it to be a bruise. Why? Well it couldn't be cancer could it. Teenagers don't get cancer, and even if they did, not me, that would be absurd. Maybe you've guessed but I was wrong.

One thing I was always told is to leave the audience wanting more so instead of delving more into my cancer story right now, lets take a coffee break and reconvene next week as not to overload my fingers with lactic acid and your heads with my dramatic tale. Now I have one final question, How should I end my first blog? "Hang on, lads; I've got a great idea ..."